Parental sharing; how to be proud without over-sharing

7 Oct

We all love our kids, it’s not a competition

Do we share too much as parents?

We live in an age of sharing.  We share holiday photos, quotes, funny videos, recommendations  and most of all, pictures of our kids.  We assume that everyone is as interested in our offspring as we are, from posting on FB to tweeting and Instagramming, with countless other public sharing opportunities too.   And why shouldn’t we share? Shouldn’t we be able to be proud of our children and tell the world how we feel?

We are all so keen to show off our kids, from their first smile to  their first steps.  “Aren’t they cute?” you ask (for the millionth time) as you show perfect strangers photos of your beloved kids.  Then, once you’ve shown their photos, you gently coerce them into demonstrating their party pieces, whether it’s reciting their ABCs or counting to 10 in Mandarin, which of course they never will do when asked!  It is at that moment that your kids decide that they are they shyest creatures in the world and that they have no idea what you’re talking about!  Why should they perform for us?  Why do we feel the need to prove their intellect or advertise their characteristics?

Showing your child's skills off

There is quite a strong backlash now towards parents who ‘overshare’, even labelling them harshly as “sanctimommy” or berating them online on blogs and forums.  See this article from The Telegraph for some people who have really taken offense to parents who share about their children.  “I think we’re all naturally inclined to share a little more information than our friends want to know – it’s just that with parents, they really don’t know where to draw that line,” says Koenig. “Their lives are completely altered, something has changed in a very dramatic way and they’re in love with their child; they’re seeking attention, or sometimes it’s just to commiserate with friends.” Unfortunately, that means “for whatever reason, parents are the worst”. Is this fair? Why can’t parents show their pride in their kids without being vilified?

being proud of our children

Unfortunately, there are some very strong opinions on the internet and sometimes politeness goes out the window.  In fact, it seems to be the new trend – saying it like it is and not holding back when you disagree with someone’s views or parenting style.  (This post by Mummy Kindness explains how people use the guise of being ‘honest’ as an excuse to be rude or judgemental.)  We think that a balance can easily be struck between showing your pride in a meaningful way and avoiding over-doing it!

Nurturing Mums Top Tips for Sharing!

1)      Posting – a few carefully selected snaps is always better than hundreds.

2)      Your kids will make you proud in so many ways over time, let them shine on their own terms and in their own time.

3)      Update your FB status once or twice a day, not more, if it’s kid-related.

4)      You don’t have to share!  It is perfectly OK not to post anything about your kids on the web; it doesn’t mean you are any less proud!

5)      Leave nappy-related info out of the picture.

6)      Remember one day your children will see all of the things you put online – a lesson not worth forgetting.

7)      Keep it away from work – be professional and keep a line between your personal life and your working life.  It doesn’t mean you can’t still be a mum at work, but people in the office might not be interested in hearing your latest potty training conquest.

8)      Join a postnatal group like Nurturing Mums where other mums want to hear your experience, value your experience, and appreciate your experience.  If you are all in the same boat, it is lovely to share.

Mummy love Nurturing Mums

At Nurturing Mums, we love seeing our new mums come into the start of each course with pride in their eyes, sharing every latest new milestone that their babies reach.  It is a lovely environment for our mums to show their delight.  Of course, none of the other mums mind, nor do we! Next course starts 12 November, book your space today and share your joy with other new local mums.

 

 

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One Response to “Parental sharing; how to be proud without over-sharing”

  1. NurturingMums October 11, 2013 at 1:31 pm #

    Another great post on oversharing and how it will affect your baby in the future: http://www.baby.co.uk/mum_stories/3493320131007/

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