When your baby won’t stop crying

30 Sep

When your baby won’t stop screaming – every new mum’s worst nightmare.  But it does happen.  Here are some strategies to help a new mum cope….

Babies cry.  A lot.  But what do you do if your baby won’t stop?  We’ve heard stories of mums walking up and down stairs, cradle holds, bouncing on balls, driving late at night to calm a baby down.  Mothers can deal with all sorts of stress, but there is something particular about hearing your baby wail that can reduce you to a snivelling mess.  You feel judged by others and more often…yourself.  It almost feels like you are a bad mum if you can’t soothe your baby.

when a baby won't stop crying

Then there are those who pick the baby up and instantly they stop crying.  Do you have a baby whisperer in your family? How do they do it? What’s the secret to calming a screaming baby down? Getting to know your baby’s cries is key.  They could need a change, a feed, to be winded, to sleep or even a cuddle.  It can be very difficult to navigate between these different cries to figure out what holds the key to that magic sound – the calm, contended sound of a baby stopping to cry.

baby soothed and contented

Then there’s the age old question of whether to use external aids to get your baby to stop crying or if you should be holding him / her a lot of the time.  Mums often complain of never being able to put their little ones down, and I mean that literally.  No rest for the weary.  Are babies that small  capable of forming habits or do they need comforting arms around them all the time? Some form of combination of the two seems logical to implement.  It is not good for you as a new mum to not be able to put your baby down.  No matter how much you love your baby, you will need a break.  And a break definitely needs to be a cry-free zone.

What should you do when your baby won’t stop screaming?

First, see your GP.  Find out if there is a medical reason behind your baby’s cries.  It could be reflux, it could be colic, it could be any number of things.

Try a cranial osteopath or other therapist who specialises in babies with colic.  It might help to relieve any tension from misalignments or muscular tension.  Get recommendations and make sure they are reputable.

Baby massage can be helpful to relieve trapped wind or colic.  Join a class with other mum friends or contact a baby massage practitioner to find out when their classes are.  In North London, try North London Baby Massage and Baby Yoga.

Go for a walk! Babies love fresh air, they love the movement of the pram and it will give you a good chance to relax and unwind.

Try a dummy.  Some mums swear by them, others would never use them, but it is worth a try.  Just keep in mind that a baby can get attached very easily to a dummy and then it could end up being more trouble than it’s worth.

If your baby really and truly cries all the time, consider getting some help, having a coping mechanism e.g. listening to music or leaving the room for a few minutes, or calling in an expert.  You don’t want the first few months of your precious arrival’s time being stressful, miserable and unbearable.

Also bear in mind, it will pass.  Every phase does!

all phases pass


4 Responses to “When your baby won’t stop crying”

  1. Dawn Frazier September 30, 2013 at 8:21 pm #

    I have twins and when they were tiny, one of them used to cry and cry and I didn’t know what to do for a while. I’d done all the usual checks and she was OK, not too hot or cold, had a clean nappy and had been fed plenty. Then I realised one day that she would cry and cry, and when I went in to check on her, she would give me a great big smile. I soon realised that her crying was just her way of getting some attention from me!

  2. NurturingMums October 8, 2013 at 7:40 pm #

    Hi Dawn
    Well done for figuring it out, hats off to you for managing with twins!! Thanks for the reminder that cries can mean a baby wants a cuddle.

  3. marissa @mamaknowsbest2 May 4, 2014 at 10:01 pm #

    I remember when my son was small and he just wouldn’t stop crying. I had tried everything……I was at my wits end. So i took a cup of tea into the garden at sat there and drank it. He was safe in his moses basket and i needed 5 minutes.
    I drank my tea (the first hot one in weeks!!!) went back inside picked him up and started again 😉
    A great post xx


  1. Having a baby not what I expected, top 10 things that may surprise you - June 2, 2014

    […] may feel like you’re not cut out to be a mum.6) You may have a baby with reflux, colic, or a baby who just cries without explanation a lot of the time.7) You may feel unfulfilled or on the flip-side become […]

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